Death and Divorce

Death is never fun this side of Heaven.  Neither is dissolution of a marriage.  Both of those happened  this week and I am still processing.

My former head boss, a senior pastor, passed away this week.  It wasn't clearly stated, but suicide is the inclination stuck in my head.  Perhaps it wasn't suicide, but I can't shake the feeling that it could be.  That thought grieves me more than if he had simply passed from other causes.  I knew him as an insecure man, fearful of failure, fearful of loss of influence, and unsure of his calling.  At the same time he was passionate about bringing the lost to know Jesus as their Savior.  He deeply cared about people finding faith in Christ.

There were moments I admired him and moments when I didn't.  I never felt he was a good leader, but he was the man God allowed to lead.  His team protected him and worked around his issues.  They managed the running of the church while letting him believe he was in control of it all.  It may possibly be the most dysfunctional church leadership team that I've been witness to.  And yet, God was continuing to work in the situation and make a difference in the lives of their congregation.  He impacted many lives for Christ, proving over and over that God can accomplish His plan despite human failings.

I grieve for his family.  I grieve for the struggles he faced that brought him to his death, and most of all, I grieve for the church -God's people who he pastored.

The other sad issue is closer to home.  From the vague and cryptic Facebook posts, it seems my cousin's marriage is ending.  I am very sad.  His wife is witty and fun.  I don't know what went wrong, and I've only been witness to social media from her perspective because he doesn't communicate much.

Family issues are never much talked about when it comes to painful things like this.  I know how much they loved each other, and I only have seen glimpses of struggles.  They were married shortly after I was.  I know there are things that could have torn my marriage apart if it weren't for our faith in Christ and being able to look to the Lord for our guidance and our strength.  She doesn't post much about faith, so I don't know if she has that support in her life.  A marriage dissolved always brings me sadness no matter the circumstances.  Marriage is such a beautiful thing that God created and we muck it up so badly.

I grieve for each of them, for their children, and for another marriage that Satan ruined.  I pray for their reconciliation.  I pray for their individual walks with God.