Living Faith

Living through the drama of cancer is like nothing I've ever experienced.  Even though it creates complications to daily life and stress levels rise easier than they used to, it is still living life.  You don't stop living.  Life goes on.  It becomes a question of whether you are going to participate and make the best of your situation.  Because what you decide to do, how you decide to act and cope makes the difference between falling to devastation and rising above the drama.

My husband had to learn to live with an array of awful symptoms that are part of his daily life.  For the past month and a half he has had to learn new limitations physically and emotionally.  Our children have had to learn to think of their Daddy's needs before their own, and have also had to deal with times when Daddy wasn't able to be 'there' and Mommy wasn't 'there' either, or had little patience.  Thankfully, many of these things are temporary.  We have grown so much, learned new things.  It has been a bumpy road and only Faith in Christ has carried us through as well as we have gotten through.  That is what this blog is all about.  Living faith in a real experience, being real with what it looks like to live your faith in the hardest times. 

Today the doctor's office called us to say that there would be no more chemo for this part of the journey.  Part of me is thrilled.  Part of me is hesitant to be thankful.  Because of the negative effect chemo had on his lungs, 3 treatments of one drug were cancelled.  That increases the risk of recurrence...something I can't bear to imagine.  I'm amazed to have survived this much and being done with chemo early is nearly too good to be true.  Is God answering prayers and healing my husband more quickly than we had anticipated?  My fear is that we're being set up for another blow.  I don't know if I could handle that. 

But...in 2 Timothy 1:7, "For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power, and of love, and of sound mind."  Who am I to fear what God has granted?  I will rejoice.  Psalm 63:6-8, "When I remember You on my bed, I meditate on You in the night watches. Because You have been my help, therefore in the shadow of Your wings I will rejoice.  My soul follows close behind You; Your right hand upholds me." and Psalm 16:8-9, "I have set the Lord always before me; because He is at my right hand I shall not be moved. Therefore my heart is glad, and my glory rejoices, my flesh will also rest in hope."