A new calling?

I've had a bit of a struggle with the Lord since learning the cancer had returned.  I didn't stop trusting Him, but I was hurt.  I didn't understand why it was back.  Hadn't I learned and grown enough for one year?  The "why" question bugged me a lot more than last time around.  I tried to let it go, but I felt distant from God.  I couldn't see what He was doing.  I still can't.

Today was Day 8 of chemo after a nice 2 day break.  I was blessed to be able to spend time with my hubby during chemo treatments and had to return to work afterwards.  On the way in I was listening to a Christian radio station.  An advertisement for a new Christian book was on and it was about how sometimes God places a calling on your life that you never asked for and don't want.  I thought it was interesting and casually thought about how it could apply to my life.  Then in my email box, the daily devotion I received was also about accepting God's calling on your life even when it isn't what you wanted.

I don't know exactly what God may be calling me to...but all I can think of at this moment in time is either something work related, or possibly His answer to my "why".  Perhaps through this time of cancer, I am to minister to my husband.  To be the rock for him spiritually.  I don't know exactly how, but it gives me a Peace to my "why" struggle and a hope in my Lord that He does indeed know what He is doing.

I ask you to join me as I pray for guidance, protection, and wisdom to know what God's will for my family is, and what His will for my behavior/words will be each moment.  Thank you!