Early this morning (around 1am) I was barely conscious of my five-year-old singing praise songs to the Lord. Too groggy to think much of it, I tried to continue sleeping. Suddenly the singing turns to an exasperated moan and she called out to me. She was thirsty and saying her head hurt. I gave her water and checked her temperature. It was 103.3. She asked to sleep with me. I gave her medicine and prepared my bed. She was moaning and miserable saying her head hurt badly from "too many happy songs". I tried to make her comfortable and told her the medicine would start helping soon. In a half-whine and half-exasperation she complained, "I have too many happy songs in my head and they're trying to burst out!"
She finally did fall into a fitful sleep before succombing to the deeper REM sleep.
All day she struggled with her fever and a headache which meant we vegged on the couch in front of the tv a lot. She was particularly touched by a cartoon called "The Littlest Angel" about a 4-year-old boy who becomes an angel and whose gift is chosen to give to baby Jesus. In a scene showing God in Heaven, she broke into song singing "Hallelujah". Then she turned to me and smiled saying, "I have happy songs in my head!"
I don't know quite what to make of these happy songs. She is my child I struggle to relate too, the one who is most like me. There is something precious within her, a sensitivity to the things of God and a love for God I can't quite fully comprehend. It amazes me and reminds me how awesome a responsibility it is to raise godly children and to be the godly role model they need. I can only hope and pray that God grants me the ability to do the job justice for Him.
PS. The CT scan came back clear! We'll get the details and more blood work at the next doctor visit.
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